FonDos and Don'ts

Hello folks, its your old paypal Evan, back with more etiquette tips! What is today's tantalizing topic?

FONDUE!

How many times have you had an awkward moment at a Fonduetable? If you're anything like the rest of america, you probably think it is a waste of money to dip bread in melty cheese as a meal, but in case someday a gay french person puts a gun to your head and forces you to go to a Fondue restaurant, you'll want to be prepared with:

"FonDos and Don'ts"
by D. Evan Oliver

Fondue is an ancient tradition started by overweight, white americans in 1986 or something. The tradition is believed to have started when they used to wear those powdered wigs ya know like you see like judges and george washington wearing in those days? yeah those. well anyway, they used to use forks and dip those wigs in hot powder, to make it stick better. Well one day, Benjamin Frankly who was fat, decided to do it with cheese and crap, and FONDUE WAS INVENTED! And with every new invention, comes a big long list of rules for using it. But once you have read my concise guide, you'll be like the guy-who-bought-a-legitimate-copy-of-windows-xp of fondue, because you'll have the Genuine Advantage!

DO use your fondue fork to dip your item in teh sauce.

DON'T put your hands in the sauce, it can be HOT!

DO use your dinner fork to remove the item after dipping.

DON'T eat off the fondue fork, no one wants your germs in the pot.

AND REMEMBER: If someone loses an item in the sauce, it is tradition them to buy a round of drinks or to be punished in another way. In some countries flagellation is common.

Ok that's it! You're ready! This is Evan "The Fondood" Aliver saying until next time, "if you're the type of person that eats fondue, you're probably the type of person I'd like to punch in the face."

Seeya!!!11one